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Dear Goldy:

I’ve been dating for many years. In the beginning, I only wanted to date someone who was planning on living in the tri-state area. I’m very close with my family and I can’t imagine going weeks or months without seeing them. Skype and Zoom are not the same thing as in-person. I can’t go to my sister’s house for a cup of coffee one afternoon or go shopping with my mom or have her pop over and bring me some “extra” supper that was left over if I live out of town. This has been the life for my married siblings, and I want it. They are always popping over one another’s house or going places together with their kids. I didn’t think this would be an issue. This is New York, New Jersey, and even Connecticut; there are thousands of guys out here and I felt like there was no need to look elsewhere.

I published this letter a few years ago. It broke my heart and I’m sure the hearts of readers, as well. I never forgot about this woman because of what had happened to her, the cruelty and premeditation of it. But I am elated to say that I received an email from her right after Purim this year with an update.

Allow me to interrupt my usual flow of articles. The articles that have been prepared weeks in advance are patiently waiting their turn to be submitted for publication.

I have been asked a few times why I am so “hard” and “write mean things” about shadchanim. Once I hear that question, I keep the eyerolling to myself and tell the person that if that’s what she thought I was doing, then she missed the point of my column entirely. Let me share some of my experiences with some shadchanim when I was single. It’s only to those people that I’m critical of and you’ll understand why.

Dear Goldy:

I am a kallah, so no need for dating advice here. I’m looking for life advice. I’ve spoken with my parents. I want to get a neutral party to weigh in.

I’ve had this article in reserve for a while. I wrote it and decided not to publish it. This weekly column is about dating. I didn’t want to branch out and start writing about other things, even though marriage is the next step after dating/getting engaged. I’m not like celebrities who use their platform to push another agenda. I may like them because of the characters they play in a television series or movie, but then they start preaching about air pollution or politics. I like them because of what they do: They act. I don’t want to hear what they have to say about our carbon footprint or anything of the sort. Stay in your lane: acting. I want to stick with dating and engagement. But a friend of mine advised me to write an article about being a good wife (but spouse seems more appropriate because I try to help both men and women). I began searching my files for this article and with a few minor edits, here it is: