Feelin’ Funny: Mordechai Schmutter

In case you want to know where I am financially, I just bought a pair of glasses that’s exactly the same prescription as my old glasses. This is after I pushed off going to the optometrist for as long as possible.

I feel like when I was a kid, you had one doctor. It was a pediatrician, and he handled everything that could possibly come up. The only thing pediatricians couldn’t handle was teeth.

Are planes actually safer than cars? Everyone says they are.

I don’t know what goes into a hotel’s decisions about what to provide their guests. But most of them somehow arrived at basically the same decisions. 

So apparently, there comes a time in your parenting career when you and your children disagree about whether or not they’re adults. Particularly with your oldest couple of children, who, ever since you’ve known them, have been children. And you’ve known them a really long time. Almost as long as you’ve known your spouse.

I’ve always seen myself as a capable parent. I’m not one of those husbands who calls his wife and asks if the kids need to eat or anything. So I didn’t think it would be a big deal to take all my kids on vacation without my wife.