(This one is not a parody. It is based on actual events with real quotes used)
The official renaming of the Gulf of Mexico as the Gulf of America was signed in an executive order by President Donald J. Trump, but he did not conceive of this idea. It originated with late night comic Stephen Colbert and then appeared in a legislative proposal in 2012 by Mississippi state Representative Steve Holland, a Democrat. “We don’t want any reference to Mexico or Hispanics of any nature,” he said at the time, clearly not intending his joke to take on a life of its own.
Not to be outdone by a Democrat, albeit inadvertently, Rep. Anna Paulina Luna of Florida proposed last month to add Trump’s likeness to Mount Rushmore. “A timeless symbol of our nation’s freedom and strength, deserves to reflect his towering legacy – a legacy further solidified by the powerful start to his second term,” she remarked.
Considering its cost and isolated location, Luna’s proposal will likely face security from DOGE. In the interest of reducing government spending, why not add another holiday to the calendar?
“Just as George Washington’s Birthday is codified as a federal holiday, this bill will add Trump’s Birthday to this list, recognizing him as the founder of America’s Golden Age,” said upstate New York Rep. Claudia Tenney. “Additionally, as our nation prepares to celebrate its 250th anniversary, we should create a new federal holiday honoring the American Flag and all that it represents.”
Coincidentally, Trump was born on June 14, which happens to be Flag Day. Tenney’s bill would make this day an official holiday. She made her proposal public on February 14, a day when many people express their love for that special someone.
In a chamber of 435 members, it is not easy for a freshman to emerge on national news, so Rep. Brandon Gill of Texas made an audacious proposal: Wipe Benjamin Franklin off the $100 bill in favor of Trump.
“President Trump could be enjoying his golden years golfing and spending time with his family,” Gill said. “Instead, he took a bullet for this country and is now working overtime to secure our border, fix our uneven trade relationship with the rest of the world, make America energy independent again, and put America first by ending useless foreign aid.”
But as these lawmakers elbow each other in a competition for Trump’s admiration, there’s another state where Trump’s name already appears on the map.
“Trump is a great friend of Israel,” Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu said in 2019 as he unveiled the Trump Heights sign for a new Jewish community after President Trump recognized Israeli rule over the Golan Heights. The font and color of the letters on the sign were identical to those on Trump Tower in Manhattan.
Now, with his proposal to redevelop the Gaza Strip, the devastated coastal enclave will likely win out in the contest for the most visible recognition of Donald Trump, originating from Trump himself.
