Dating Today

Dear Goldy:

One of my friends redt a shidduch for me. The guy was one of her husband’s friends. I was told up front that he lives in France, but “is moving” to New York, so the next few months may have a lot back and forth. I was fine with that.

Dear Goldy:

 My boyfriend and I have been talking about marriage. Things are very serious. We’ve never been the type to stand on ceremony or be too proper or too Mr. Manners, so he began introducing me to his friends and family a couple of months ago. Yes, everyone is nice and sweet and seems to accept me, but the one thing I can’t get passed is how snobby and stuck up my boyfriend’s sister and cousin are.

This is one letter that I was hoping would be sent, but I didn’t want to hold out hope. I also didn’t want to hound the woman who wrote the original email. But imagine my surprise when I opened my email and saw her address in my inbox.

Dear Goldy:

I don’t know what else to do or what to tell people anymore when they ask me the rude question of why I’m not married yet. It’s an obnoxious question; it’s like saying, “What’s wrong with you that no one wants to marry you,” or “Why are you being so picky; the perfect guy doesn’t exist, lower your expectations.” It’s a very personal question. Why don’t I just ask someone why she chose her spouse, “No one else wanted to go out with you?” I’ll switch it up on them and turn the tables. The people who ask the question aren’t even trying to help. They just ask it out of wonder, like my personal life is a general topic of conversation, like the weather or sports.

Sometimes the answer is easy. Sometimes it isn’t. I don’t think there is anything wrong in admitting that sometimes you don’t have the answer. It keeps us human and grounded and also gives us the opportunity to learn from others who may know the answers we seek. I didn’t know how to respond to this email, but I didn’t avoid or ignore it. I did my best.

Dear Goldy:

I’m writing to vent. You said you accept these types of emails; well, here it is. I’m 35, not a novice to dating. Been there, done that.