Are you living life right? When was the last time you truly questioned your journey or path? You may feel a tad lost and crave a more meaningful existence. Do you ever examine or evaluate your values or virtues? If you tend to dive into the deepest or rawest parts of yourself, you just may be soul-searching. Feel like your aura is bit dusty? Believe it or not, many of us who are chronically anxious and unhappy may be disconnected from our very souls.

What is the point of everything? Who am I really? Do your actions in your everyday life support your true self? We may have no idea what steps to take to enrich our human experience or to nurture our souls. We need to reconnect to the truest parts of ourselves, sweet friends. Sure, you have cultivated your personality and have developed extensive knowledge about innumerable things. But what do you know of your psyche or essence? People don’t care how much you know, until they actually know how much you care.

Trust me. Your outer and inner worlds are connected. Did you hear about the guy who was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam? He looked into the soul of another boy. Heh.

No matter how successful you become, or how fit you are, there is that nagging feeling that something is missing. Speaking of fitness, your brain said: “crunches” but your stomach auto-corrected it to “cupcakes”? Sheesh. These days your favorite activity may be going back indoors where it’s warm. Listen, if you at least laugh till your abs start hurting, you don’t have to go to the gym. But truly, if you wish to know more, feel more, and experience more, don’t be afraid to flex your intuition muscle.

Society reinforces soullessness by worshipping the false self. Instagram anyone? Your favorite beauty product is a Snapchat filter? I get it. By the way, what would it take for the DMV to get some dang filters for driver license pics? Every false self has a wound inside that truly needs to be healed. Try not to live for the ego, which lives on compliments. Instead, live for accomplishments.

If you seek answers, know this: Your answers may not be the same as mine. Be brave. Take it from John Wayne: “Courage is being scared to death, and saddling up anyway.” Your speed does not matter. Forward is forward.

Your soul may be whispering to you. Do you know what you are most proud of? What do you regret? If you do not pause, you will surely not hear it in this frenzied, feverish, fast and furious world. If your anchor is still on the bottom of the sea, how can your boat sail forward?

Please do not confuse doing with “being.” Begin a spiritual practice. Believe me: It can awaken parts of you that you did not even know existed. Explore and discover what connects you to your higher self. Decide who you wish to be and work on creating and developing that version of yourself. Channel your time and energy into finding balance in your life. You may well discover who you are by seeing who you are not.

What legacy do you wish to leave behind? Some people are only as deep as their most recent inspirational quote. Yes, there is beauty all around you. Look for the shining examples in every little thing. Prioritize your happiness, sweet friends. Are you willing to surrender who you are for who you can become? Remember, you are a work in progress, without a completion date.

Are negative emotions taking up a lot of your headspace? Feeling stuck is an inevitable part of our journey. Remember that life is not so easy to troubleshoot. Self-analysis is a good thing. We can all do with a regular tune-up. No need to feel disconnected from who you truly are.

Perhaps you make many decisions based on what others expect of you. Step back and take a look. What’s working and not working in your life right now? Your answers may show up in the form of a book you’re reading or that song playing in the background right now. Trust the one who can puncture your ego and still manage to remain your best friend. By all means, find people who invigorate and impress you. As for me, if you want to impress me with your car, it better be a food truck. You know junk food would be a lot easier to avoid if it actually tasted like junk.

But truly, please practice being happy. Don’t you want to refine yourself into the best version of “you”? Who would not want to be a more realized person? Claim a few minutes for yourself in the midst of your daily grind. There is no magical switch to turn on your inner self. It is a path you walk for the rest of your days. Life, after all, can be summed up in three words: It goes on.


Caroline is a licensed psychotherapist, crisis counselor, and writer with an office in Queens.  She works with individuals, couples, and families.  Appointments are available throughout the week and weekends.  She can be reached at 917-717-1775 or at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. or at facebook.com/pages/Safe-Haven-Healing.

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