On Thursday night, April 30, Chazaq hosted an uplifting shiur at Congregation Charm Circle featuring Rabbi Shaya Cohen, Rosh Yeshivah of Yeshiva Zichron Aryeh. Rabbi Cohen opened by noting that more money is spent on the pursuit of happiness today than on almost anything else, yet the world remains an unhappy place. We see the evidence of this in high rates of suicide, substance abuse, divorce, and abuse.
He taught that we already know the secret, as it is revealed to us in lashon ha’kodesh (the holy tongue). We know that every letter and every root in every Hebrew word carries a specific meaning; whenever a root appears, it describes the very essence of a concept. David HaMelech had one request: to sit in the House of Hashem his entire life. He famously said, “Ashrei is the one who sits in the House of Hashem,” a prayer we recite three times a day. Sitting in the House of Hashem is the essence of happiness.
The root of the word Ashrei is alef-shin-reish. Osher means validation, and validation means feeling good about oneself. The secret revealed to us is that happiness is about feeling good about oneself. This is the universal formula that HaKadosh Baruch Hu revealed to us in the lashon ha’kodesh.
Since the secret of happiness is validation – feeling good about oneself – what can we do to get there? To illustrate the importance of purpose, Rabbi Cohen asked what a therapist would say if a client walked in and said, “I have no purpose in living.” He noted, “I would order a suicide watch.” One critical ingredient for happiness is meaning and purpose in one’s life. Purpose is a complex concept, but it provides a person with meaning, which in turn provides validation.
Klal Yisrael is the one nation that experienced a public revelation from the Creator Himself at Har Sinai in front of millions of eyewitnesses. There, Hashem told us exactly what our purpose is. The Torah was passed down accurately from generation to generation to this day, never changing throughout the ages. In the Torah, we are told that we have a purpose, and that purpose is very special: A human being should strive to achieve the ultimate G-dliness: to go in the ways of Hashem and to cling to Him. It is an exhilarating, uplifting purpose. My purpose in this world is to be G-dly, and that realization is incredibly validating.
The Rambam teaches that if a person has extra money on Purim, he should prioritize giving gifts to the poor because it is a time of simchah (joy). There is no simchah as great as rejoicing the hearts of downtrodden people. One who uplifts downtrodden hearts is likened to Hashem; he is acting in a G-dly fashion. The more I feel like I act like Hashem, the happier I feel about myself, and therefore I am happy because I am validated. I feel I have a purpose, and that purpose is so uplifting.
Rav Henoch Leibowitz zt”l, Rosh HaYeshivah (1941-2008) of Yeshiva Chofetz Chaim, shared that the pasuk says, “Be holy.” Chazal teach that this is saying that a human being is so great because he has such G-dliness inside of him. We have a lofty purpose in this world. Since I am in pursuit of G-dliness, it opens a whole new vista in my life: my ability to connect to Hashem. This is the ultimate. Not only do I have an exalted purpose, but that purpose leads me to a bonded and intimate relationship with Hashem. What could be better than that? He is my best friend. Shlomo HaMelech described this in Shir HaShirim: “I am to my beloved and He is to me.” It is friendship, it is love, and it is a relationship. I feel that Hashem loves me – what more can I ask for?
Chazal tell us that Shlomo HaMelech composed Shir HaShirim on the day that the Beis HaMikdash was built. The mashal (parable) used is that of an estranged couple. Why this mashal? Because the true test of a relationship is resilience. It is not that we have a perfect relationship, but that even when mistakes are made, we are always coming back together again. Nothing can keep us away. I am engaged in an intimate relationship with Hashem, and that relationship is resilient and permanent. It is validating to have an eternal relationship with the Borei Olam.
How is this clinging connection to Hashem expressed in human terms? Rabbi Meir Simchah of Dvinsk writes that the source in the Torah for bitachon (trust) is that we should cling to Hashem. That tells us that we must have trust. Trust is the most important midah in any relationship, and that trust is an expression of our intimate bond with Hashem. This is something we can incorporate into our daily lives.
We live in a challenging world, but when a person learns the art of bitachon in Hashem, everything is different. I may have problems, but Hashem takes care of everything. They are His problems; our problems are His problems. What a relationship! Throw your pekele (burden) on Hashem. I don’t have to worry about anything because He will take care of it. No burden, no fret, no worry. He delivers on His promises. The Chofetz Chaim teaches that the degree of trust we have in Hashem is the degree to which He answers us. Even for those who simply hope that Hashem won’t let them down, what peace of mind and what koach (strength) that provides!
When a person truly puts full trust in Hashem, he knows that Hashem only created the world to do chesed. I know that His mercy is never withheld and that His chesed is endless. He never ignores bitachon. Our t’filos (prayers) are influential and our bitachon is influential. Knowing this, how good I can feel about myself!
By Susie Garber
