What are the unique talents and strengths that you can offer our beleaguered world? Hey, I have lots of hidden talents. The trouble is they’re so hidden, even I can’t find them. Sharing your savvy or smarts with others is an expression of love.

You may not even be aware how your sense of humor lights up her day or how your smile sustains him. Most smiles are started by another smile.

Be generous with your gifts. Don’t hold them back for “someday.” After all, how much does generosity of spirit cost? Imagine for a moment if we were going around complimenting each other effusively, and eagerly encouraging one another. Go ahead and pass those accolades and appreciation around.

We are all fighting inner battles, sweet friends. No one amongst us is free of insecurity, fear, or self-doubt. So please extend to others compassion and forgiveness instead of judgment or righteous indignation.

Once you discover your strong points and specialties, feel free to give them away. Know this: When you change, the world changes. You may very well be an exceptional example to him without even knowing it. Bringing out the best in yourself and others is a priceless offering to the world.

What drives you? Speaking of driving, people say 60 is the new 40. The cop who just pulled me over didn’t agree. Someone, give civilization a speeding ticket.  But seriously some of you have no doubt turned your darkest moments into your greatest strengths. What has made you who you are today? Can you do more, care more, or even love more in your life? When nothing seems to offer you satisfaction, the secret may be more giving. Your greatest gift is not wrapped in paper, sweet friends.

Trust me. Feelings are what truly give your life significance and purpose. If I had no emotions, I don’t know how I’d feel about it. But truly, try to fathom what your emotions are trying to teach you and use them to grow and develop. What were the most cheerful and charming moments of your life? I’ll wager they were chock full of feelings.

No one is asking you to laugh in the face of hurtful or even crippling moments. But we can use our gloom, grief, and even fear to create positive changes. You can accomplish more than you ever thought possible.

True closeness doesn’t come about magically or even spontaneously. It is due to a set of behaviors and habits that you do daily. Are you truly listening to her? Hey, your secret’s safe with me. I wasn’t even listening. Uh-oh. Trust me. Your ears will never get you into trouble. Listen in such a way that others will actually want to share with you.

Try not to be easily wounded, especially with those whom you trust. Without true friends, life can seem hollow – even harsh. Longing for connection is one of the most compelling needs we humans have.  Coffee and friends make the perfect blend. Stay grounded and take life one cup at a time.

Keep your sense of wonder for the simple pleasures. What are some of the small things that make you feel alive? Is it even possible for us to experience each and every moment fully? We certainly owe it to ourselves to try.

So, please give your time and attention to your loved ones and others generously and from the bottom of your heart. Free yourself from blame and shame by forgiving yourself and those who have made amends to you. Let go of all of your presumptions about people. Trade in your need for recognition and respect for awareness and appreciation.

Be not only grateful for what you have, but what you have to give. Let’s be honest. How you impress or influence the world is driven by what you offer.  You matter more than you realize.

Do things you revel in so much that you lose all track of time. You know what they say: The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time. Well, they also say the best things take time. That’s why I’m always late. And we all know: Three o’clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do.

Still stumped? Go ahead and ask your friends and loved ones what they think your unique strengths are. Pick the friend who loves you when you forget to love yourself. You could very well be a role model for someone at this very moment. So, how do you show up in the world? Go ahead and do something for someone who can never repay you.

Caroline is a licensed psychotherapist, crisis counselor, and writer with an office in Queens.  She works with individuals, couples, and families.  Appointments are available throughout the week and weekends.  She can be reached at 917-717-1775 or at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.  or at facebook.com/pages/Safe-Haven-Healing.