“CNN rated top satire website in the country”

“Constitution breaths sigh of relief after Biden retreats back to basement”

“Journalists baffled by necessity of Trump’s Middle East peace deal for ‘mostly peaceful’ region”

“New poll shows majority of dead people prefer universal mail-in voting”

“In response to Trump’s recent peace deals, liberals renew their support for John Bolton and call for war again in the Middle East”

“Madden video game now allows you to have players kneel during the National Anthem”

“Op-Ed: I don’t want my child to live in a world where Jews and Muslims get along with each other”

“Local kid grounded by parents for not being able to sit in front of a screen for remote learning 8 hours a day”

“Mayor de Blasio gains bipartisan support immediately after being furloughed due to budget cuts”

“CDC director says killing yourself most effective way to flatten the curve”

“Shocking new study finds 99.99% survival rate if you cooperate with police”

“Responding to backlash, New York Times says its content is ‘mostly bias-free’”

“Trump passes executive order mandating progressives quarantine for life”

“Anonymous source cites anonymous source citing yet another anonymous source claiming Trump doesn’t call on certain news outlets at press conferences because they use anonymous sources who use other anonymous sources”

“New poll shows majority of Democrats prefer Biden’s teleprompter over Biden”

“Governor Newsom allows California to burn to the ground to own Trump on climate change”

“Nation that aborts over 300,000 babies a year suddenly worried about children’s health and safety during pandemic”

“Trump’s support among terrorists reaches new low with signing of Middle East peace deal”

By Rafi Metz