Truthfully, I wrote about this topic years ago: the need to tell stories to your kids. But the stories should be made-up ones, not ones you simply read from a book. Those don’t have any lasting value.
I’m talking about the likes of Ignots, who lived in an apple tree in the forest; Fat Mack, the fattest man in the world who always tangled with Yosemite Sam; SuperYid; Asher Zelig; and my favorite: The Long-Nose Man – the story of a boy who got his nose caught in his mother’s car door, leaving him looking like an elephant.
The zookeeper, thinking he was an elephant, locks him in the elephant’s cage. The story evolves from there, but you get the picture.
My kids were enchanted with each story, and a few of them would sit on my stomach as I related the story. If I paused for a moment to gather my thoughts, they would cry out, “You’re thinking! You’re thinking!” – catching me in the act of trying to figure out what came next.
Yesterday, on Shabbos, one of my granddaughters claimed that she had never heard the story of The Long-Nose Man. I was glad to oblige her request, as it is my favorite story to tell. Soon, she was joined by a grandson. So they sat through the story of zoo director Dr. Fiddleforts and his efforts to investigate the matter. He ultimately takes the boy home to his mother, only to find the entire family looking like different animals.
I was thinking how great it is that my stories can span generations and keep the relationship with them very much alive.
So, if you want to forge a lasting relationship with your kids and grandchildren, try telling them a story – but it must be one that you make up.
Rabbi Yoel Schonfeld is the Rabbi Emeritus of the Young Israel of Kew Gardens Hills, President of the Coalition for Jewish Values, former President of the Vaad Harabonim of Queens, and the Rabbinic Consultant for the Queens Jewish Link.
