Does your school dictate what your child should wear? As someone once said: Shout-out to my school uniform for saving me from making terrible fashion choices in 9th grade. The bad hair, however, is on me. And we all know that sneakers speak louder than words.
Do y’all remember when your mom picked out your clothes? Then one fine day, you wanted to decide for yourself what color and style you wished to wear that day.
Believe it or not, how you present yourself to the world can be a serious statement. Have you ever come to a conclusion about someone based on what he was wearing? “Oh, he must be bookish and boring. She’s so rich and vain in head-to-toe Gucci and LV.”
Perhaps you even make assumptions based on where he comes from. You presume that she is snobbish or that because he is athletic, he must not be too bright.
When you get dressed in the morning, what message do you wish to convey to the world? You never thought about it? Know that you are highlighting things about who you are and what you may believe.
Your choices do speak to aspects of your personality. Do you tend to be understated and modest? Do you prefer athletic, comfortable clothing or a more refined, businesslike look for your daily life? It’s been said: Clothes aren’t going to change the world. The women wearing them will.
You may have anxiety about what to wear to a job interview or crucial social event. Perhaps you wish to portray a certain image, particularly around new people. Needless to say, when your best friend comes over, no need for makeup; and your comfy slippers will do. Then again, it’s always shoe o’clock somewhere.
Likewise, your home says a great deal about you. Who chose those decorative pillows and that vase on the coffee table? Sure, the hotel you just stayed at for the holidays was a tad more impressive, but after a bit of time, you may have felt a strong ache to return to your humble abode.
That pang has little to do with material comfort. Your home actually reminds you who you truly are. In subtle ways, it displays what you care about. Indeed, your home is a temple. Look around, sweet friends. Does your home embody your spiritual values?
Which objects convey your identity? When you enter a home, what qualities are you drawn to? Perhaps you find your favorite plant consoling. It may be that you wish to set the tone with a relaxing, comforting style to induce a calm mood.
The neatness and orderliness may serve to stabilize you in this chaotic, complex world. Try to create a relaxing, comforting mood somewhere in your house, sweet friends. Buy that lamp, cautiously burn some scented candles. Steer clear of clutter.
Simplicity can help you feel grounded. Tangible, material things can help you discover aspects of your identity. Religious artifacts, the painting or vase you bought abroad. After all, your home is your soul’s very container.
Believe it or not, you are a different person depending on what is in front of your eyes. Your mood shifted when you entered that room just now. Why? Because design actually matters. Ideas enter your mind through your senses as well. And you know what they say: IKEA: The Swedish word for “I can’t put this together and I’ve lost a screw.”
But truly, carved angels sat upon ancient temples. Stained glass windows speak of our biblical values. Ask yourself what image you wish to project, sweet friends. It’s been observed: Some people look for a beautiful place. Others make a place beautiful.
Caroline is a licensed psychotherapist, crisis counselor, and writer with an office in Woodmere. She works with individuals, couples, and families. Appointments are available throughout the week and weekends. She can be reached at 917-717-1775 or at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..